Time Travel Tip

OK, this made me laugh...

Second Man on the Moon

The other day I went to the bank to cash a check, and one of the clerks had hand-lettered a little sign that asked, "Who was the second man to walk on the Moon?" This was taped to the front of the counter, so I assumed it was "today's trivia question" or something.

I knew it wasn't Neil "one small step" Armstrong, and I didn't think it was John Glen, so I asked my teller, "Um, is it Buzz Aldrin?" Her eyes big as saucers, she blurted out, "You'r the only person to get it so far today!!"

"What?! You're kidding...."

"No! Most people just come up and say 'ok, I give up. Who is it?'!"

I had to then tell her about my run-in with ignorance at another bank, this time back in Stockton, CA. The shiny golden dollar coins hadn't been out long, and I was trying to amass a stash for use as spending money at historical events. I asked the teller if I could trade her a $10 bill for ten Sacajeweyas, and she just returned a blank stare. So I said, "The gold dollar coins." She then said, "Who's Sacajeweya?" The thought bubble over my head was reading, "What rock have you been living under? Don't they teach US history in schools anymore?! Do you even know who Lewis & Clark were you ignorant little twit? Put down the remote and read a book!!!!"

Luckily I didn't say any of that. Still, I weep for this country.

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Soft Americans

The History Pundit speaks his piece on the un-manning of American males.

Tall Ships Festival - Tacoma

The boys (and girls dressed as boys) of our Military Guild (Goode's Company of Foote and the Renaissance Military Society) turned out to support the Nina replica at last weekend's Tacoma Tall Ships Festival. Apparently it went well, and the public was treated to the sight of actual Spanish Conquistadors of a sort.

Happy Independence Day!

Hope you're having an alien-free, indigestion-free, bug-free day! I myself am enjoying peace and quiet at the moment, bearing in mind that I may be tranquilizing a horse and/or calling 911 before the day is through. Anybody who might be thinking about driving down the main road near our property and hurling unnecessarily loud incendiaries out your window? Don't do it, k? last year two horses had to be put down* in this part of Washington State because of catastrophic injuries resulting from spooking over loud fireworks. My tolerance for loud noise after hours is zero already, do please don't make me call The Man. I've only had to do so twice so far this year. Do we really need artillery practice after 10:00 PM? No, we do not. Last year I'd already called five or six times by the 4th. I think the local fuzz have perhaps made it clear to the Tribe Next Door (literally) that annoying the curmudgeonly white settlers across the road is bad PR, so things have been a lot quieter this year.

I don't care what they do all day, as long as it's not ridiculously loud. On the 4th and New Years, I expect some hubub...just don't push it too far after midnight, please. The rest of June/July/December? Knock it off! Some of us moved to the country for actual peace and quiet.

* That's a euphemism for "killed humanely", in case you haven't run into the term before.

Drowning

Right now I feel beleaguered. I feel like I'm in a prolonged underwater fight sequence: one of those scenes in a movie that goes on so long that you either grow impatient (if it's poorly done) or grow short of breath (if it's engaging). Meanwhile, the people on the surface, in the boat representing the rest of my life, are waiting for me to slay the monster or other erstwhile opponent and emerge victorious to help them with whatever travails they are facing.

At any rate, I'm tired, frustrated, panicky, angry, and unhappy with myself. I'm pretty sure one or more of those people in the boat is stepping on my air hose. It's not helping.